- Just was congratulated by Tiger Woods on my Nike+ for running a record time for a mile. Ran it in under 8min flat, almost a lifetime record! #
- Just got a “prize notification” mail fraud letter from Canada. What’s odd is I can’t find anybody talking about anything like it online. #
- The level of sophistication on the fraudulent check they included is quite amazing compared to the cheap phoniness of the included letter. #
- What’s this beeping pattern you’re yelling at me alarm clock? I don’t speak morse code. Please be quiet until you learn to speak English, k? #
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